on the mat is a state of mind
4 weeks of yoga everyday. Wow. I’ve now been doing yoga consistently (at least 4 classes a week) for 4 months (it’s a lot of 4s I just threw at you, I know), and there’s no way that anyone could have prepared me for what I’ve been through – physically, mentally and spiritually – since October. Everything about my life is different: I’ve started a new business, have new friends, a new house, a new housemate, a new relationship with myself and a new relationship with the world around me. I see things differently. I see myself very differently. There is more flexibility and more strength. There is more room in my life for…well, everything.
My stumbling block in this situation is to slow my roll. If you know me, you know that I am not exactly a girl who takes her time and lets things unfold (I’m working on it). So much has changed for me in the last year, and so quickly, that every now and then I get thrown off kilter. I notice all the change and want to act, to do, and what I need to do is be with it. Experience the place I’m in on any given day.
In class tonight, Yvonne had us doing some really fast moves that she warned us we’d trip out on if we didn’t slow down before stopping. Like, literally trip, as in: hallucinate, as in: seriously off balance. (Thanks, Yvonne, for providing me with an appropriate yoga/life comparison) When things change too much and too fast, you have to proceed with caution, transitions have to be a bit longer and more deliberate. Given that I’ve made all this room in my life for new friends, relationships, work, etc, I’m tempted to add more, but I have to remember that this much change takes time to settle.
In Meditations, I’m still reading about the yamas, specifically brahmacharya, which loosely translates as celibacy (not so relevant) or moderation (much more apropos). These days, moderation is what it’s all about – even with yoga. While I would love to be on the mat for two hours everyday, I’m still trying to move out of my old apartment, while living between suitcases and collecting boarding passes. I do what I can, when I can, but it’s very important to me that my practice remains exempt from my to-do list.
Just as I had to work up to pace in class, and slow down before stopping to stay balanced, I also have to work up to pace in this new life I’m living, adding things slowly and allowing for periods of adjustment. Moderation, in all things.